Glenburn: The Hike That Turned Into a Scenic Detour"

So, Glenburn somehow snuck onto my hiking list. Why? Honestly, no clue. Maybe it landed on the “close enough, sure” list or the “meh, might as well” pile. One thing’s for sure—it did not make the “shaded and not going to fry you alive” list. But there we were.

Tucked away at Glenburn Lodge and Spa in Muldersdrift, I braced myself for one of those “lodges trying to re brand their backyard as a hiking trail” situations.

I figured we'd get flat-ish terrain, decent views, and maybe a sprinkle of that lodge-y charm. All of which it kind of was.

I dragged along my trusty hiking buddy, Paprika. Together, we form the dream team of hiking dysfunction. She’s out there speed-walking through the trail like a cheetah on speed, not totally focused on markers and stuff, and I... well, I struggle to find my way out of parking lots, much less actual trails.

At reception, they told us to download an app for the trail—only to hand us a paper map two seconds later. Why? No clue. To make us feel extra prepared, maybe? (Clearly no-one called ahead to warn them about this dynamic duo.)

Anyway, we were given two options: 4 km or 8 km. Naturally, we opted for the 8 km. However, we actually ended up doing the 4 km.

The trail itself? Honestly, not bad. Mostly follows a river, with a few inclines and some mildly technical spots to keep it spicy. There was even a (very) brief cameo from a baboon and some buck, which added a splash of “ooh, nature!” charm.

But here’s the thing: thanks to our combined attention spans (or lack thereof) and outright disdain for paying attention to trail markers, we definitely went rogue.

Look, I’ll give credit where it’s due—the scenery was lovely, with rivers, trees, and those picturesque hillsides Muldersdrift is known for.

But to be honest: I’ve been spoiled rotten by brutal yet unforgettable hikes in the Magaliesburg. Comparing those to this? Not fair. But apparently, I’m a glutton for unfair comparisons because I keep doing it. Someone slap me.....hard!!

This hike, for all its prettiness, lacked the punch of a true, sweat-drenched adventure. It’s not Glenburn’s fault, really. It’s just... I’ve become a hiking snob. There, I said it.

Perhaps it needs to be added to my new list: “Trails I Need to Revisit Because I’m a Moron.” Yep, Glenburn deserves a do-over—not because the hike was terrible, but because I am.

I suspect the experience could be completely different if done right. Thinking about it now, I vaguely remember seeing something about booking a guided hike... maybe that would’ve been the smarter move. Hindsight, am I right?

Would I recommend it? Sure. Just don’t go with anyone as directionally-challenged as me.....or Paprika.......or anyone who thinks an app and a paper map are basically the same thing.

RATING

AREA - Muldersdrift

COST  

R200. When I read a review on Google....post hike (note to self: read reviews before the hike) it said you pay R200 for the hike and receive a voucher for the full amount to use towards a meal at the restaurant

We paid R200 each—but were told that R50 is 'refundable' as we could get a poolside drink afterward.

I’ll just say it: R200 is steep. And no, the Appletiser we got post-hike did not feel like R50 well-spent.

DIFFICULTY

Not flat or easy, but not hard.

LENGTH - 4 km

TIME - 1 hr 15 minutes

ELEVATION -  No idea

MARKERS

Good, but clearly not good enough for Pinkie and the Brain.

HIGHLIGHTS 

Really was pretty, and the lodge in general seemed lovely.

ABLUTIONS -  Great

SAFE FREE PARKING

AMENITIES 

Wedding/conference facilities, spa treatments, a guest lounge, and massage and beauty therapy. On-site activities include bird watching, hiking, fishing, and putt-putt

ON A FINAL NOTE

Definitely worth a visit for those who are not serious hikers.