Hiking: An Introvert's Cheat Code To Being Sociable

Diagnosed By Instagram Memes

Okay, it’s confirmed: I am 100% an introvert with ADHD (because the universe said, “Let’s see what happens if we combine these two disasters”).

It's the unholy combo of “I want to be left alone” and “entertain me peasants.”

And how did I finally get a label for my “personality”?

Memes. 

Yep—those little squares on my Instagram feed, constantly validating my "condition".

Finally - I see myself represented!

Turns out I’m not just a nutjob with a bad attitude (well… maybe a little).

I’m an introvert with ADHD.. 

Officially diagnosed by memes.

Certified.

Stamped.

Practically medical at this point.

How Introverts Make Friends (They Don’t, Really)

People assume that introverts can make friends.

Not so much.

Very seldom .... maybe ..... if the stars align, caffeine levels are adequate, and the Wi-Fi is down, an introvert might initiate something "resembling" friendship.

Mostly? An extrovert stumbles across them, finds their quiet weirdness oddly endearing, and declares: “Mine now.”

Congratulations, introvert. You didn’t make a friend - you got adopted. 

Like a sad little puppy someone scooped up off the street, because they couldn’t bear to leave it shivering in the rain.

From there, the extrovert takes over all the actual friend labour - scheduling plans you never asked for, introducing you to people you had zero interest in meeting, and privately making excuses for your “default glare of quiet judgment.”

Meanwhile, the introvert just drifts in now and then, drops a few sarcastic comments and intolerant vibes, and drifts right back out.

Hiking: A Hack for Introverts

But trail friendships are the ultimate introvert hack - temporary alliances with equally awkward humans.

No follow-ups. No dreaded phone calls. No suffocating small talk.

Just shared silence, mutual suffering, and maybe a stray complaint about how evil the incline is.

It’s the one social activity where the rules are gloriously simple: walk, breathe, don’t die.

And every now and then, two introverts might accidentally bond into something that resembles a friendship.

It’s not the loud, over-planned variety, but the introvert kind: quiet, free of forced fun and the relief of simply being allowed to be yourself.

And somehow, a few of those friendships have found their way to me. They’re rare, precious, and I feel genuinely blessed to have them.

The Extrovert Collector’s Edition

So the next time you see an introvert with a bustling friend group (yes, still me...hanging on by a thread), don’t be fooled into thinking they’ve secretly mastered the art of socializing.

Nope - that’s just an introvert who got kidnapped by some very optimistic extroverts who thought they could “fix” them. 

They could not.

But by the time they realised this....they were too emotionally invested to return the introvert to the wild.

On behalf of my entire species of socially-malfunctioning goblins, a heartfelt shout-out to our adopters - masters of patience, chaos, and tolerance, who decided we were worth the effort.

Not that we’ve mastered handling them either.

Honestly, it’s unclear who’s enduring who at this point.

It’s basically a hostage situation, but with coffee.