Windybrow Game Reserve: The One That Ghosted Me For Too Long

This trail had been sitting on my “to-hike” list for so long it was practically paying rent.

Not because it’s remote or mysterious, but because getting information about it felt like trying to contact a very disinterested void.

For months (fine, nearly a year), communication was… optimistic at best.

Replies, when they appeared, had the enthusiasm of someone being asked to do unpaid overtime.

Twice I even “booked,” until I called to confirm and was casually informed that hiking that day was suddenly off the table.

Most recent attempt: messages sent, blue ticks received… and then nothing.

By that point, my flabbers weren’t just gasted - they were deeply offended.

Turns out, I wasn’t alone in this little communication wilderness.

A few new hiking buds had all hit the exact same wall.

Naturally, this only made me more determined.

Persistence Pays (Eventually)

After one final attempt - my tone firmly in the “please just tell me what is going on” category - I finally got a response.

No greeting, no context, just “Contact Francois 0829084318.”

Could that information have been shared months ago? Absolutely.

But sure. Let’s move on.

And just like that, everything changed.

Replies? Prompt.

Information? Clear.

From that moment, Windybrow became a reality.

Meet the Tribe

Our hiking crew for the day - temporarily referred to (pending official Spice names) as E² and S&M - was mostly the same group that tackled DeWildt the week before.

We met at 7 am, and were greeted by a warm, helpful Francois, the manager.

The Trail

There are a few route options, but we opted for the longest, the 10km trail.

I had mentally prepared for a relatively flat, leisurely game walk.

It was not flat - not even a little.

Instead, the trail delivered a steady stream of what I call “rude inclines”.

Add in sections of loose rocks that demand your full attention, and suddenly this “easy walk” starts feeling a little less easy.

Game sightings were limited, though the zebras did show up and absolutely understood the assignment.

Elegant and photogenic.

Unfortunately, you can’t just order wildlife off a menu. (Well… technically you can, but that’s not really how nature works.)

But honestly, you don’t go just for the animals.

The landscape does plenty - varied terrain, changing scenery, and just enough unpredictability to keep things interesting.

Also, we found owl poop.

Because nature is glamorous like that.

Thanks to S (resident expert in surprisingly niche topics), we learned that if you break it apart, you can see hair from the owl’s last meal - conveniently pre-processed, no plucking required.

OWL POOP

Diamonds? Sadly, No.

One of the more surreal features is the view of nearby mining activity around Cullinan - yes, that Cullinan, home of diamonds.

You can see the mines from the trail, which adds an odd contrast - rugged nature meets industrial ambition.

Is it environmentally ideal?

Probably not.

Does it weirdly work anyway?

Somehow, yes.

And no, we did not find any diamonds.

Not one.

We did, however, have a fully hypothetical plan in place if we had.

Returning them was not part of that plan.

Just for the record.

A big thank you to this little group that’s slowly but surely morphing into a Tribe.

It made for an unexpectedly great day on an unexpectedly awesome trail.

RATINGS

Trail Information

AREA

Cullinan

COST

R 75 - cash or card.

Trail Details

TRAIL DIFFICULTY

I remain in a committed rivalry with inclines, but regular hikers will cope just fine.

Just leave your “easy walk” expectations at home.

TRAIL LENGTH

We chose 10 km

TRAIL MARKERS

Good - shockingly so, considering the pre-hike communication situation

TRAIL HIGHLIGHTS

The beautiful zebras, fleeting wildlife sightings, and different views

WEATHER CONDITIONS TO CONSIDER

Very open - sun exposure is not optional

ABLUTIONS

SAFE FREE PARKING

AMENITIES

Google is your friend.

NOTE TO SELF

Turns out the secret isn’t persistence - it’s finding the right human.

Who knew.

FAMILY FRIENDLY

Yes

PET FRIENDLY

No

ON A FINAL NOTE

If you start with Francois, you’ll be in very good hands - skip the chaos and go straight to the part where things actually work.

After that, expect rude inclines, solid scenery, and just enough variety to keep things interesting.

(TO)SOLO OR (NO)SOLO

(NO) SOLO for me….the rocks are invisible, the inclines are rude, and dignity is fragile.